04.24.06

I’m not depressed. I just don’t like you.

Posted in general at 10:41 am by cornflower

I have a work collegue that I need to talk small talk to for 5-10 mins a day. If I don't, she starts dissing me to people and causing trouble for me.

WTF is with that!?

I pay my "dues" to her but I resent every minute of it.

And there is a girl at college, luckily she is only in a few classes because she has taken to sticking to me like Clamp the Mighty Limpet and I can't seem to get her off.  WHY ME!!?!?!

I'd much rather talk to imaginary people on the internet instead of Misses Chatty Cathy.  You can't scroll the drivel real-time.  As another introvert pointed out to me, these extroverts latch onto introverts like life-savers because, unlike other extroverts, we are not waiting for a pause in the conversation so that we can interject something about ourselves.  We are actually capable of listening.  Which is manna from heaven for an extrovert. 

They will snort as much of that listening shit as they can get.

Caring for your Introvert

04.23.06

More on iodine..

Posted in Uncategorized at 12:19 pm by cornflower

The absence of iodine causes a hormonal dysfunction that can be seen with practically every hormone inside the body. Dr. Flechas has recently been able to show that patients with insulin resistant diabetes have a partial to full remission of their illness in the presence of taking iodine. Iodine deficiency is also felt to be the source of ovarian cysts. With iodine replacement therapy the cysts disappear and women have stopped having ovarian cysts.

http://www.cancercontrolsociety.com/bio2005/flechas.html

http://www.helpmythyroid.com/iodine.htm

04.22.06

The more I read…

Posted in health at 11:06 pm by cornflower

The more convinced I am that something is terribly wrong with our diets, and at this stage I believe that it's iodine.

Today there was another interesting article in the paper about childhood obesity.  It backs something I have been thinking for some time.  Our culture has not changed dramatically in terms of amount of exercise over the last 5 years. 

The article.. The Shocking truth of Childhood obesity states in part:

The study of 5407 students from 90 public schools in NSW, commissioned by the State Government, contradicts the "urban myth" that children are increasingly inactive and hooked on sedentary pastimes. They are exercising much harder than in the 1990s, and yet still stack on more weight.

Dr Booth found 23 per cent of girls and 26 per cent of boys were overweight or obese in 2004 – both up from about 20 per cent in 1997.

But the children, aged four to 16, were exercising harder. More than 80 per cent in years 6 to 8 were adequately physically active – spending at least an hour a day in moderate or vigorous activity – compared with less than 60 per cent in 1997. "This flies in the face of what I think was an urban myth that children were inactive," said Dr Booth, who was so surprised that he ordered a recalculation. "Like everyone else, I believed the urban myth …"

That leaves over-eating as the main culprit, and throws the spotlight on the promotion of fast food and snacks.

Although I don't doubt that diets have degraded over the last few years, I don't believe that fast foods and snacks are the main culprit.  I think it's more likely that the nutritional content (including iodine) has decreased over the last few years (I have read a number of studies to that effect) and what we are seeing is an increase in the volume of food children eat because they require that much extra volume to get the same nutrients that their predecessors were obtaining from less food.

04.21.06

I hate being under this much pressure..

Posted in general at 11:06 pm by cornflower

This job interview thing is dragging on.  and on. and on.  I'm so frustrated I could scream.

I've been stuffing around at work all week because I've been in limbo over it.  I've never experienced this type of interview stress before.  I need some more irons in the fire so I don't feel so anxious about it.

The second interview involved a trial in the office for a couple of hours, which the guy who rund the business did not stay around for.

Anyway, he has said that he is happy with my skills etc but he feels he does not have a picture of what I would be like to work with. So he wants me to have another trial half a day. He asked me some pretty tricky questions and told me that he felt he needed to break past the facade.  (Hmm…  it's an INTERVIEW.. I'm supposed to be acting PROFESSIONAL) Anyways, I'm cranky that he didn't stay around for the first half day and now wants me to do another half a day.  I have to make those hours up and it makes for a very long week.  He should have stayed for the first "trial" time I was there.. or made an alternative time if he couldn't make it the first time.  What a waste of my time!!  And now he wants me to do it again!! :(   Tempted to tell him to get stuffed.

I can't keep taking all this time off for trials. I've had two interviews with this lot so far, one of which lasted 3 hours.

I don't know what to do. I asked for the contact details of their last office manager, called her, she said "yeah, main dude procrastinates." Sure does!!

I've never had this many interviews with the one company in my life.. it feels like I'm being strung along. I think the bottom line is that this guy recognises that I'm good but feels intimidated by me, and isn't sure how that is going to work.

AND I have an exam tomorrow.. AND tomorrow is baby making day.  Not that that is likely to happen with all this other crap going on.

I'm seriously feeling over my life this weekend, I want a new one.  Where do I resign????

It’s all a little fishy…

Posted in health at 9:00 am by cornflower

Two articles on Dioxins appeared in SMH today..

Dioxin tests for fishermen families

How these toxins build up and contaminate our food chain

Commercial fishing was banned in Sydney Harbour in January because of high levels of dioxins found in seafood, and the Government warned that it was not safe to eat more than 150 grams of Sydney Harbour seafood each month.

On average, Australians consume between 5 and 22 per cent of the amount of dioxins that the National Health and Medical Research Council says is acceptable.

In animals dioxins cause endometriosis, genital deformities, reproductive problems, and damage the immune system. The exact impact of average dioxin exposure on most people, however, is still being debated by scientists.

While there is no clear indication that normal exposure is causing disease, the Environmental Protection Agency in the US has also pointed out that a lack of evidence does not necessarily mean a lack of effect.

Ah yes.  Innocent until scientifically proven guilty.

04.20.06

If mama ain’t happy…

Posted in adoption at 2:59 pm by cornflower

Another article here:

http://www.mamazine.com/Pages/feature62.html

Interesting.. I'd wondered the same about cultural camps – not exactly a contemporary look at the culture.

Like language lessons, I guess some kids are going to hate them, some are going to love them, and some are going to hate them, but appreciate them later, especially if they want to go back to their birth country at some stage. 

The only parallel I can draw in my own life is that I'm still pissed my parents never made me play the piano.  My ex is still pissed his folks refused to pay for guitar lessons because his older sister had begun the piano, hated it and given up.  A weak analogy, I know.

I think I'm really overthinking this whole thing.  Each kid is different, so there is no RIGHT answer to how much cultural exposure you should involve a child in.  I'm trying to apply a one-size-fits-all approach to an individual.  There are no guidelines entitled "Top 10 things to do for your transracially adopted child to help them become perfectly well adjusted and not hate you for removing them from their culture".   I guess I'm just really cognizant of the fact that my choices may profoundly affect somebody's life, and I want to get it RIGHT for them, damn it!

I've also been thinking more about the anger many of the adoptees have.  I'm trying to understand it. 

I remember my first encounter of sexism after growing up in a pretty much non-sexist environment.  I got a job working as an Assistant Accountant.  There was another assistant accountant there, a guy, two of us doing the same job.  I remember my first day, when I was asked to take over the coffee-making and the typing.  I remember how absolutely furious I was.  How offended I was.  How insulted and belittled I felt.  I had never experienced anything like it before and it was absolutely shocking to me… I started reading alot fo feminist literature and I became very, very, angry.  I used to carry around a can of black spray paint on the car, and when I saw a sexist billboard (and there seemed to be a rash of them at the time) I would jump out of the car and spray paint clothing on the women who were being degradingly portrayed as sex-objects. (Much to the chagrin of my friends and relatives.)  I felt *dehumanised*.

I can only guess at the additional dimension racism and adoption would add to the mix, and as much as I want to, as much as I see that anger as more than valid, raw, I can no more on an experiential level understand it than my male friends could understand my reaction to scantily clad women on billboards.

So here I sit, a blue-eyed blonde who will probably piss off her kids just like all of the mothers gone before her.

Welcome to parenthood.

04.19.06

Sepia – super squid

Posted in health at 11:23 am by cornflower

Sepia is the ink from a squid. The squid usually lives alone, it is an independent individual. In case of fear or danger they surround themselves with a hiding cloud of dark ink.

When we project this image on human beings we find that the homoeopathic Sepia suits people who need (more) personal space around them, who cherish their independence, and who surround themselves with a dark emotional cloud of negative temper in case they don't get it. Sepia especially turns out to be a remedy for women. There are two types of Sepia women: one is the independent and ambitious career minded woman, and the other one is the mother who feels that the responsibilities for her family ask so much that there is no time left for herself. Women who need Sepia can also be a combination of both types.

Sepia

Sound like anyone we know????? Good job I'm on a full dose of it. Between this and the Nux Vomica, I'm generally a quite relaxed little bunny indeed.

Interesting paper..

Posted in adoption at 10:48 am by cornflower

Intercountry Asian Adoption: In the best interests of the child?  I found this picture of the menacing caucasian easter bunny standing over the crying Asian child quite disturbing. 

04.18.06

More pretzel brain twisting…

Posted in adoption at 4:17 pm by cornflower

I've been reading more on the adoption lists.  There is one couple there who have hired a privte detective to search for their child's mother.  They are of the view that the trail will go cold if they leave it until their girls are old enough to try and find their birth parents themselves, so they will do it for them, now.   

Another lady put posters up around where the child was found with pictures of the child, letting the Mother know that the kid was OK and was going to the US.

I think if we adopt, I will do both of these things.  I want to get some input into trying to find the parents using a PI tho'.. I would not want the Mother to get into trouble for abandoning the infant as it is a crime in China,  she's already been through enough without punishment from the State.

And I've been reading the blogs again.  This time a different adoptee was angry about the poem that appears on the blog of future adoptive parents, about the birth mother's pain and the adoptive Mother's happiness.   I went and read it and I didn't find it so bad.  To me, the a-parents that are the most obnoxious are the ones that seem to act as if God dropped the baby out of the sky, special delivery, no return address.  At least this particular a-mom acknowledged the Natural Mother's existance and feelings.  That's a big step up from alot of the a-parents I read comments from. 

Maybe it's just that I'll never quite understand the rage some of the adoptee's feel towards a-parents.  I need to decide if I can handle this kind of rage from an adopted child of my own if we decide to go that way.

I've been looking around for Chinese language classes for both myself and kid's classes.  It seems that often interracial adoptee's want to go back to their home-country at some stage and if we adopt I would like our child to be able to do that will as little of a language barrier as possible.  On the other hand, I don't want to push a kid into a whole lot of stuff which may make them feel even more different than they already feel.  I'm considering also joining a Chinese Church so that Chinese lessons etc. don't feel so abnormal. 

And of course which Church has classes for kids to learn Chinese?  St Petes! 

04.17.06

Where are all the breasts?

Posted in health at 12:24 pm by cornflower

At the moment I'm working on lowering the pesticide load on my body, psudo-estroegens in particular. We've started to microwave stuff in glass containers and drink water out of glasses instead of plastic bottles to reduce the intake of SE that way.

I'm also only eating organic chicken (and organic everything else) to reduce the hormonal intake from there as well. So.. on my recent trip to Woolies I noticed that there are never any organic chicken breasts there. Whole birds, thigh fillets, but no tenderloins or chicken breasts. There isn't even a space for them to go. Woolies never stocks them.

I really want to know where the chicken breasts have gone? They must be somewhere!

Pseudoestrogens are endocrine disruptors that either occur or are released into the natural environment and influence or mimic the function of hormones.  They are found in pesticides, synthetic hormones, plant constituents, plastics, detergents, and environmental pollutants.

http://www.uni.edu/pubrel/newsroom/op-ed/chemdep.shtml

"Estrogen is produced not only by the ovaries and adrenal glands, but also by abdominal fat cells that convert other hormones (particularly testosterone) into estrogen. The more weight a woman carries, particularly around the abdomen, the more estrogen circulates in her body.."

And how do you get a disproportionate amount of abdominal fat?  My nemisis, Adrenal Exhaustion, of course.

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